W-E-L-K-E-R

Picture worth a 1,000 words

UPDATE: How dare the Jets cry about being disrespected! Since when is respect only a one-way street? This is the same group of "professionals" who mouthed off about "kissing rings" and seeking to "embarasss" their opponent. They name three "captains" who all played for the Patriots even though one of the them is the fourth string quarterback. How do the Patriots respond? Do they trash the media about how the Jets QB isn't the second coming of Joe Neimeth? Or how Rex Ryan's scheming plans look foolish in retrospect? Do they hold out their rings and demand they be kissed?? No, they play football and throw the ball with 30 seconds left even though they were up 14 points. WOW! And the Jets including their 500 lbs coach cry disrespect! Listen boys, one can't be respected until you learn the meaning of the word.

Where was This Guy on the Campain Trail?

Senator McCain's well spoken remarks on the anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. Worth repeating today, Veterans Day:

In retrospect, this all seems unobjectionable. But I can assure you, my friends, it was anything but. Some objected because they thought America had no right to preach moral values when we failed to live up to them ourselves at times. Others objected because they felt the most America could do for human rights was to lead by example, but not take sides on the internal matters of other countries. Still others objected because they saw issues of morality and human rights as secondary to the real business of foreign policy – to the trade-offs, and deal-making, and interest-seeking of the world as it is, not as we would wish it to be.


We heard all of these arguments back then, and we hear them again now – for this great debate over human rights and foreign policy is as old as America itself, and it continues to this day. I know the Bush Administration spoke a lot about freedom, and democracy, and human rights. But that does not make them dirty words, and it does not make them ideas unworthy of our support today. Quite the contrary. The good thing is, America's long-running debate over whether, and how, to support human rights offers a lot of lessons to guide us at present. I'm just old enough to remember some of them, so I'd like to suggest a few of these lessons to you today.


Most important is this: The United States has a special responsibility to champion human rights – in all places, for all peoples, and at all times. Why us? The answer, I think, is simple: It's who we are. Human rights – the right to life and liberty, to the protection of property, and to rule by the consent of the governed – these values are the core of our national creed. And it is fidelity to these values – not ethnicity or religion, culture or class – that makes one an American.


And yet, human rights are not just American values; they are universal values. We embody them, but we do not own them. We think it should not be just the purpose of our government, but of all governments, to protect human rights. And when we see rulers who violate the basic rights of their citizens, it offends a sense of justice in us that we believe is shared by all people, regardless of their differences. It leads us to demand better of governments, for the simple reason that it is the right thing to do. Since America's earliest days, human rights have shaped not only who we are, but how we conduct ourselves abroad. And this should never change.

Jobs - Real and Unreal

The White House has wagered an enormous amount of its credibility on the Stimulus package and its ability to create jobs. As I mentioned in this blog previously, the pork-ulus that was the stimulus bill was a laundry list of Democrat programs that had very little to do with job creation. As that became more obvious, the tag line for the program changed from a plan to "create jobs" into "create or save jobs." Note the "or save." That part is practically impossible to track or let alone substantiate. However, as Catwoman might say, "prrrr-fect." Having "fuzzy math" (as one might call it) makes public talking points easier than hard facts. But when hard facts emerge, the talking points become more difficult.

White House economists originally floated the following graph to show how their stimulus plan would improve the jobs situation if passed. Superimposed are red dots that show exactly where we ended up even though Congress passed the plan.

Needless to say - thanks for THAT.

Knowing clear well that it hasn't created jobs, White House moved on to hanging their hat on the "saved" part. They sent out forms to all Stimulus participants asking them how many jobs were gained or saved due to the money. Results: 1,000,000 jobs created or saved! Wahoooo!

But then the digging began. Even using their results, the spending doesn't look too good. At the time of the survey, $250 million of stimulus money was spent and $288 million of tax credits were given. So....that works out to $538,000 per job saved. Those better be pretty good jobs! But if that weren't enough - Local and national news services started to dig too, and found out that many of the supposed jobs "saved" don't actually exist.

The Sacramento Bee newspaper reported, "Up to one-fourth of the 110,000 jobs reported as saved by federal stimulus money in California probably never were in danger." A Florida paper reported that a Florida day care center that claimed stimulus money "saved or created" 129 jobs when in fact the money they got was simply used to give all existing employees raises. The Wall Street Journal reports that a Kentucky shoe store owner, Buddy Moore (no relation), saved nine jobs with $889.60 in federal stimulus money. How? Well, he supplied nine shoes to the Army Corps of Engineers. Somewhat confused, he determined that those nine engineers couldn't do their jobs without shoes, so 9 shoes = 9 jobs. Even The Boston Globe reports today, "While Massachusetts recipients of federal stimulus money collectively report 12,374 jobs saved or created, a Globe review shows that number is wildly exaggerated." They go on to cite a specific instance,

"One of the largest reported jobs figures comes from Bridgewater State College, which is listed as using $77,181 in stimulus money for 160 full-time work-study jobs for students. But Bridgewater State spokesman Bryan Baldwin said the college made a mistake and the actual number of new jobs was “almost nothing.’’ "

The list goes on.

The problem stems from how people were supposed to count "saved or created" jobs. Simply stated: If any employee's salary is paid, in whole or in part [any part!], count that as a job "saved or created" by the spending. So, if a factory gets $5000, and divides that, $50 a worker, among 100 workers, thats how many jobs were "saved or created."

I liken this "jobs" survey to auto dealership customer surveys. If you have purchased a car, or had a car serviced in the last few years, I'm sure you have been subjected to the dreaded customer service satisfaction survey. On it's own, it sounds like a good idea. OEMs want to rank their service providers in terms of quality. However, on their scale of 1-5, nothing is good except a perfect score, a five. Therefore, after you've purchased/serviced a car, you get the salesman speach, "you will get contacted to take a survey. Only "5" matters, so please tell the survey taker '5' on all items. Anything less than '5' is a failing grade." In many cases, they offer you a benefit for giving all fives - free oil change, etc. So the OEMs take the time to conduct these surveys, but the data are worthless based on how the survey is constructed. Nevertheless, the OEMs don't care! They get to promote "perfect customer satisfaction."

The "saved" jobs report is the same thing. Participants who received money, don't really know how many jobs they "saved," so they provide the most optimistic scenario. There is no incentive to be conservative, because those that created the survey want to see the most amount of jobs possible. They WANT to be told what they WANT to hear.

TV imitates life

I found this pretty funny. I'm old enough to remember the first V, and it's way before Obama. Does Art imitate life, or visa versa? From the Chicago Tribune Entertainment Section:

Imagine this. At a time of political turmoil, a charismatic, telegenic new leader arrives virtually out of nowhere. He offers a message of hope and reconciliation based on compromise and promises to marshal technology for a better future that will include universal health care.

The news media swoons in admiration -- one simpering anchorman even shouts at a reporter who asks a tough question: "Why don't you show some respect?!" The public is likewise smitten, except for a few nut cases who circulate batty rumors on the Internet about the leader's origins and intentions. The leader, undismayed, offers assurances that are soothing, if also just a tiny bit condescending: "Embracing change is never easy."

So, does that sound like anyone you know? Oh, wait -- did I mention the leader is secretly a totalitarian space lizard who's come here to eat us?Welcome to ABC's "V," the most fascinating and bound to be the most controversial new show of the fall television season. Nominally a rousing sci-fi space opera about alien invaders bent on the conquest (and digestion) of all humanity, it's also a barbed commentary on Obamamania that will infuriate the president's supporters and delight his detractors.

Haunted Neighborhood

Our first Halloween in the new neighborhood was a success. The layout of our community is ideal for trick-or-treating. There's only one way in, one way out, and 48 houses in between. The trek started shortly before sunset. Katie was dressed in the same costume as last year, a gypsy/pirate (under the guise that no one here had seen it before). Emily took to the role of Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz.

We were joined by the Buchmueller, Anna and Tommy, plus their dad, Ross, got into things by dressing as Shrek.

With the exception of maybe three houses, everyone gave out candy (well, expect the house that gave cans of soda pop and coupons to his local restaraunt). There was also one house that gave us adults a tasty treat as well.

Given that some areas around here are quite rural, our neighborhood was a targeted drop-off zone. If I had to guess, a couple hundred kids patrolled the streets between 6-9:30pm.

By the end, a couple pounds of candy was carried by each child. We got last years' stash to last through New Years. We'll see if the same applies this time around.

Minnesota Adventure

The Buchmuellers, friends from back in New York, came to visit us this past weekend. In an attempt to do something Minnesotan, we decided to visit Severs Corn Maze in Shakopee (http://www.severscornmaze.com/scornmaze.com/). Along the same lines as the Outlook Hotel in the movie The Shining, Severs has a massive maze which you walk inside. However, instead of hedges, the maze is slowed into a corn field. The idea is an excellent one. The execution was o.k. at best. Although traveling though the maze was enjoyable, and the kids liked it, the puzzle itself was not particularly diificult. Each turn you took ended up somewhere. There were no dead ends or chances to get yourself lost. Nevertheless, we took pictures inside the corn stalks, and had a good time.

We went for the maze, fun some other attractions at the "festival" were more interesting. Beyond the standard petting zoo, and pony rides, Severs had a 3' deep corn kernal pit. Diving right in, one got to essentially swin in corn. Although you don't sink in more than a foot or so, you can certainly dig down or dive in. Needless to say, we were finding corn in some unusual places for the next few hours.

Another fun spectacle was the pig races. No highbrow horse racing here. No Bostonian dog track. This was three not-so-little pigs running around an oval in a race for a single mini donut. It was a laugh, and the kids got to root for Hammah Montana over Arnold Snortzenneggar. A couple of cheese curds later, and we were headed home.

The whole thing had a bit of a "county fair" feel, and was surely a lcoal experience.

Katie and Emily School Pictures

BREAKING NEWS - MLB Awards AL & NL MVP Awards to...

Oslo (Oct 9): For his contributions to the game of baseball, and broadening fans' horizons, Major League Baseball has taken an unprecedented step of awarding both the American League and National League MVP awards to U.S. President Barrack Obama. Although the decision to grant the awards was orginally made after his amazing first pitch at the 2009 All-Star game, MLB Presidents decided to announce the awards today in Oslo as an attempt to one-up the Nobel Committee and be more "Obamatastic," according to league sources.

Move in Day

Today the truck arrives in Minnesota.

Verizon Troubles

I have had a week of Verizon customer service issues. It's been a nightmare. Frustrated, I shot off the following email to Ivan Seidenberg, the CEO of Verizon.

Mr. Seidenberg,

I am a portfolio manager and have met you time and again. However, I write you today as a customer. It is incredible to me, as both a customer and investor, at the level of conglomerate bureaucracy that Verizon customer service is. Up until very recently, I was a Verizon FIOS customer. I lauded the service to all who would listen. However, recently I was transferred from New York to Minnesota. As you are well aware, Minnesota is not a FIOS area.

I rented my house to a tenant who wished to keep Verizon. I spoke to four different customer service representatives who each told me something completely different about whether the tenant could assume my Verizon equipment. At the end of the day, it was determined (for reasons that do not make sense to me) that they could not assume my equipment. Since I did not want to lose my @verizon.net email addresses, I chose not to cancel my Internet service right away. I was willing to keep paying for FIOS without using it. However, the new tenant was unable to establish their own equipment unless I terminated my account. Consequently, a representative in Fiber Solutions in Syracuse instructed me to cancel my service, call back customer service to have my email “enabled.” Such action, I was told, would allow me to keep my email accounts for another 20-30 days. I followed his instructions, terminated by account, only to be told by someone else in Fiber Solutions that they had no idea what the former representative was talking about.

An escalation specialist, Enid – also in Syracuse, was helpful but in the end unable to do much. She (somehow) re-established my emails for 24 hours ending today. She called DSL/Dial-up Sales on my behalf to determine that I could get a dial-up account and keep my emails. However, when we called together another dial-up sales person, we were both told that in fact, no she was wrong. I couldn’t establish a dial-up account in Minnesota.

Today, I got a voicemail from yet another Fiber Solutions representative who instructed me to call Dial-Up and gave me a number to call. The number didn’t work. I tried to activate a Dial-Up account on-line on a specific dial-up account setup website, and received a message half-way through the process that the website wasn’t working correctly. It instructed me to call yet another (800) number. That (800) number did not service dial-up accounts. That person transferred me to a dial-up representative. After waiting on hold for 15-minutes, I was not in-fact transferred to dial-up sales and had to be transferred yet again.

Finally, the dial-up representative for New York, told me that I could not establish a dial-up account because I did not have a Verizon phone number in New York. Why I need a Verizon phone number so that I can dial into the Verizon network is beyond me! If I were traveling across the country, and needed to dial in, it would not matter what type of phone I used to do so. I attempted to use a relative’s NY phone number to establish the account, but was told I would have to call FIOS to establish an account because the number was associated with FIOS sales. That relative with a traditional landline Verizon phone, does not have FIOS! Determined, I tried calling the Minnesota Verizon number – waited on hold for 25 minutes, but no one answered. What’s even crazier is that I don’t intend to actually use the service! All I want is to keep my email addresses.

So, after speaking with eight different representatives (including two supervisors), waiting on hold for a grand total of 45 minutes or more, I have multiple, mutually-exclusive solutions to my problem that no one can seem to do in their own department, yet when I call those departments, they have no idea what I’m talking about. The answers I receive make no logical sense to someone who clearly understands how the telephone/internet infrastructure works.

In the end, I am trying to throw money at Verizon, and no one seems to want it. It is truly unbelievable.

A disgruntled former customer and puzzled investor,
Bill Moore

Can you believe, he personally responded within an hour, and the SVP of Customer Service was on the phone to me within a half an hour of that. I'm impressed with that.